1. Revise this line to include a metaphor or a simile: "At the time, I didn’t realize that I was taking too many credits each semester during the summer."

2. Revise this line to use personal pronouns such as "we," "you," or "your," "I," and "us" and/or more concise language with short, powerful phrases: "At a very young age, farm kids start irrigating, maybe with parents, every summer. Some farm kids start babysitting as young as 9 or 10 years old."

3. Revise this line to include alliteration (same first consonant sound) at some point (you can add any words you need to so that it will work): "I also have done wedding and event planning, worked as a barista, worked in retail, mentored, nannied, and tutored."

4. Revise this line to use parallelism (a repeated structure - the sample shows repetition and parallelism): "Someday I want to move into administration. I want to make a difference at a higher level. I also want to help people."

The revision of this line to include a metaphor or a simile: "At the time, I didn’t realize that I was taking too many credits each semester during the summer." is:

At the time, I didn’t realize that I was a porcupine taking too many credits each semester during the summer."

The revision of this line to use personal pronouns such as "we," "you," or "your," "I," and "us" and/or more concise language with short, powerful phrases: "At a very young age, farm kids start irrigating, maybe with parents, every summer. Some farm kids start babysitting as young as 9 or 10 years old." is:

"At a very young age, farm kids start irrigating, maybe with parents, every summer. They start babysitting as young as 9 or 10 years old."

What is a Metaphor?

This refers to the figure of speech that is used in order to make direct comparisons between two or more dissimilar things.

Revise this line to include alliteration (same first consonant sound) at some point (you can add any words you need to so that it will work): "I also have done wedding and event planning, worked as a barista, worked in retail, mentored, nannied, and tutored." is:

"I also have done wedding and event planning, worked as a barista, worked in retail, sent mails, nannied, and tutored."

Revise this line to use parallelism (a repeated structure - the sample shows repetition and parallelism): "Someday I want to move into administration. I want to make a difference at a higher level. I also want to help people." is:

Someday I want to move into administration and make a difference at a higher level. I also want to help people