Question

Part B
Write the essay’s introduction paragraph. Remember, your introduction should include a hook, background information, the topic, and the thesis statement you wrote in part A. The introduction paragraph should include five sentences.

This is all my stuff:
Topic: Curfew

Introduction:

Hook: It’s better to be safe than sorry. Background: Curfews are used to get kids home at a certain time. Thesis: A 9:00 p.m. curfew helps keep kids safe, healthy, and out of trouble.

Main Idea: It’s unsafe for kids to be out after 9:00 p.m. Supporting Detail: Kids could get lost on their way back home once it gets dark. Explanation: Parents can keep kids safe by making them return home by 9:00 p.m.

Main idea: Teenagers may be drawn to unsafe or illegal activities if they’re not supervised. Supporting Detail: A curfew will help teens avoid things that are illegal or dangerous. The teen years are full of dangerous temptations, and a curfew would help keep teenagers out of trouble.

Main Idea: A curfew helps kids stay healthy. Supporting Detail: Kids need a full night of sleep to do well in school each day. Explanation: Lack of sleep can result in poor concentration the following day.

Curfews help make sure kids are safely home at an appropriate time. Curfews help kids develop healthy lifestyles. Curfews help keep teenagers out of trouble.
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If you answer this I will mark you the brainliest as soon as there are 2 answers.

Answer 1

I am not quit sure what your question is but I think it is great! :-) Only thing I would change is your hook. With the hook you want something strong to grab the readers attention. Example: Would you stay out late just to suffer many consequences? (Sometjing like that) Try to use something to really make the reader think about your topic!

Answer 2

Looks about good! I would also suggest that you change the hook to something. Maybe talk about how research shows that kids with curfews get higher grades than kids without them(that is not a fact at all, I literally just made that up to prove a point) then you can maybe end your hook by asking a question like “So, how can curfews affect children?” then go into your first body paragraph(Remember that you do not in any way have to use these if they’re not your cup of tea, I’m just giving examples of what I might do). Other than that, you seem to be just about set. I would give more criticism for it but I would be using high school standards for a middle schooler’s essay.