luctra20
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Hi could anyone please proof read and give out pointers for the following text.

Statistics are great indicators of standard of living but there are other less measurable factors that need to be taken into account. Things like family connections, safety and life work balance are very important. In the Solomon Islands, most people live happy, safe lives and divorce is virtually heard of. If you believe the media, the crime rate in Australia is rising. We have 151 prisoners/100,000 people (The Global Economy 2015). Yet in the Solomon Islands there are only 46 prisoners/100,000 people (The Global Economy 2015). Also in Australia with the amount of stress and depression we have suicide mortality rate of 13.2 people/100,000 people (The Global Economy 2016) . In the Solomon islands it is 4.7 people/100,000 people (The Global Economy 2016), 8.5 people/100,000 people.
If given a choice most of people would choose to live in a country like Australia with a great education, health systems and many job opportunities. Australia’s income enable the population to enjoy a very comfortable life and access services easily. In the Solomon Islands however, this is not the case. Despite the lovely climate and beautiful beaches it offers, the people of Solomon Islands have a lower standard of living than Australia. Their overall health situations and education levels are well below Australians standards of living. The Solomon Islands may be a lovely place to visit but very few Australians would actually like to call it their home.

Respuesta :

Statistics are great indicators of standard of living - I suggest that you say "great indicators for a standard", or "great indicators for the standard"

living but there are other less - add a comma before the but

Less measurable factors that need to be taken into account...work balance are very important. - You just mentioned that these are less measurable, however here you're saying they're "very important"

safe lives and divorce is virtually heard of. - "Virtually unheard of." You could also say "Rarely heard of." Or, just "rare."

we have suicide mortality rate of 13.2 people/100,000 people - "we have a suicide mortality rate..."

The Solomon Islands may be a lovely place to visit but very few Australians would actually like to call it their home. - "...loveplace to visit, (add a comma) but very few..."

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